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We received a news flash from one of our readers Mr. Barry Nevans that car manufacturer Toyota has just released it's new line of hybrid cars, particularly the "military spec" Prius. He is an art director for ZooCore Design and was out in Iraq on a recent photo shoot assignment. While presenting his brochure concept for the new product launch, he snapped this shot of the prototype Toyota poised for action. Note the old and trashed Hummer H1 in the background, a true relic with many features migrating into Toyota's new flagship. The 2008 Prius, with its clever moniker of "priUSAttack" has been retrofitted with all the latest technologies and gadgets necessary to continue this war for oil on a budget. And with the price of gas going through the roof, this will be a welcome artillery piece for our young combat troops, saving our country thousand of gallons of fuel each week.
The obsolete, gas-guzzling engine of the decommissioned Hummer will finally be silenced by an array of 12 volt motors and acid bathed batteries. The only sound you'll here over the "humming" of the electric engines on this ride is the blasting of the Browning .50 CAL. machine gun attached to the roof. Well equipped to "cap" any insurgent who's dumb enough to get within range of this savage new vehicle. Mr. Nevans was unable to learn if Toyota was going to roll out a civilian version of this beast, but did hear they were looking into it. Barry said it would be perfect for traveling down the HOV lanes back at home, adding that whenever some idiot is just hanging out on his cell phone driving 40, you could load up a clip, pull the trigger and clear out the lane.
Some of the vehicle features Barry was able to grab from the his presentation of the top secret Hexagon documents are as follows:
• Complete, welded steel roll cage to protect your passenger (AKA the gunner)
• Fully integrated "rapid-fire" machine gun turret (50 CAL.) mounted to roof
• Dual fire control switching, either at gun breach or as a steering wheel mount
• All windows are bullet-proof with interior factory defrosters still operable
• Bullet proof Lexan headlight covers allow for full-beam penetration (each lamp measured at 500,000 candle power)
• Expanded trunk for carrying over 10,000 .50 CAL rounds and 2 dozen rockets
• Run-flat tires at all corners with no need for a spare (no room in the trunk anyhow due to magazine and RPG storage)
• De-latched and seamless doors for extra security* (must enter vehicle through rear hatch) *This feature may not be available on the civilian model
• Kevlar side skirt inserts in each door panel for added protection
• Clearly branded with the priUSAttack graphics (also developed by Barry @ ZooCore Design)
• Full under body armor plates for thwarting IED or roadside bomb attacks
• 120mm rocket launcher mounted under front grill (disguised as running lights)
• No color options available, delivered in olive drab only (consumer models will have more paint selections)
• Interior is clad in heavy-duty vinyl for easy clean up of most blood splatters(consumer models will have a leather option).
Stay tuned and watch for this new Knee Jerk machine heading stateside soon!